Exposing Great Evil, as Witnesses,
Announcing Great Change
(Blog 0018 AndrewHadden.com. Posted: 2026/01/11)
I am writing this with my wife, Amber, who has written a section on her story, below. We are eyewitnesses, to great evil, whom God prepared to expose it, as his eyewitnesses. We are ministers, and prophets, that minister to leaders in the Church at large, and leaders in government, including world leaders, by telling them the future, and whatever else God wants them to know – but have remained hidden, in God’s purposes. But we are being revealed in a way that should ignite worldwide revival, but may frighten millions into suicide, if not handled correctly – thus we seek the help of anyone who can spread the hope that this represents, when properly understood. And there is great evil going on in secret that is about to be judged publicly, that God wants us to explain to you, lest the world be frightened, beyond anything that has ever frightened them. [As a warning to parents, Amber’s story is necessarily somewhat graphic, in describing what these evil people do to young girls and women.]
God has been preparing us to be servant leaders of his people through these times, the end times, for decades. When God first announced my calling to me, I was utterly shocked. But God eventually confirmed it through minister after minister until I just had to accept it. I was in my denomination’s seminary at the time, and had just intensely studied the end times, and also had just found myself standing before Christ. He had just had me read Revelation 11, and then said, “You will be my witness. Go and fight the Beast.” But God eventually explained that, in Revelation chapter 11, the two witnesses are defenders and deliverers of God’s people in the end times, like Moses. In Zechariah chapters three and four, where they are predicted in prophetic types, they are leaders in the Church and in government, and channels of God’s anointing for God’s people for the great end times revival and harvest of souls. They are referred to as, “the two olive trees,” in both places, to make the connection of the two passages clear. Olive trees provided oil used to anoint leaders, oil that was symbolic of God’s enablement for their roles.
Both my wife and I were delivered into the hands of the enemy at birth, who knew our callings, because God knew overcoming Satan’s worst would make us strong enough for our callings. But we both also grew up in the Church, and in families involved in ministry.
We are witnesses, eyewitnesses, as victims, to the greatest evils on the face of the Earth, and going on in secret, in government, the Church, education, and many other areas of society. This is evil about to be decisively judged, across the Earth, by the obvious justice, judgment, of God, such that if it is not explained, God has warned that people all over will lose hope and trend toward suicide. The parable of the tares, false wheat, and Christ’s explanation of it, in Matthew 13, is soon to be fulfilled, with judgment across the globe. However, God has decided, out of mercy on the nation, and on the perpetrators, to initially judge only a small portion of them, in hopes that others will repent. The first phase will fall upon those in the Biden administration, and those substantially in league with them, in their evil deeds and worse plans. God had me warn them, but delayed the threatened judgment out of concern for the stability of the nation. And he considered bringing the full judgment of the tares, across the nation and the world, but again was concerned about the nation’s ability to recover.
The judgments will come, both phases, and they will come on people who may maintain the appearance of being very fine Christians. However, they are secretly serving Satan, and seeking to destroy the nation, and destroy the Church from within, and doing great evil to our children, and seeking to do far worse evil soon, including the annihilation of Christians across the globe. And they seek to put the Antichrist, the Beast, in power.
God is acting in defense of his people, and especially their children, and his people need to know that, or they could be shaken to the point of suicide, thinking the end times have begun with indiscriminate judgment, such that they feel there is no hope for them. This will be because God is judging not just government officials, but seemingly “perfect” Christians, and even ministers and their wives, and seemingly great leaders in the faith, who are really the wolves in sheep’s clothing among the sheep, of which Christ warned (in Matthew 7:15-20). Justice for the oppressed, the victimized, sometimes absolutely has to be by the judgment of their oppressors, who refuse to repent, having been warned for many years.
God had me lovingly warn them for decades, even murderous Satanists, offering them mercy upon repentance. Not one turned from their evil.
Explaining the Evil Among us that God is Judging
Besides the explanation above, I felt God wanted me to give you the concise explanation I have given to people very high in our government, below. But let me warn you, big tech email providers will block email containing these topics, and give no hint that they have done it. I have tried to email pastors, and it simply does not arrive if this topic is mentioned, with no message provided that that has happened. That, in itself, is evidence in favor of the truth of what we expose.
The primary technique used by those aligned with the rising Antichrist will shock you. They have ways to control people outside their conscious awareness or memory. They also ensnare people with sex, and use it as a way to get and increase control over them. Sex, whether molestation of a child, or rape, or consensual sex, opens up a pathway for demons, and it is clearly taught in the Bible. (I will explain my credentials below, but I have done much deliverance/exorcism.)
Let me explain technically how this memory suppression and control works. Children have a built-in ability to suppress traumatic memories, in many cases, that would otherwise very much disrupt their lives and damage them very deeply. God seems to have built this ability into them, but it does not happen reliably after age eight, unless suppressing the abuse started before then. This phenomenon is called dissociation, and dissociative amnesia, and it, and related conditions, are in the psychologists’ and psychiatrists’ Diagnostic and Statistical Manual, the “DSM.” It is as if the person separates the memory from what they consider to be themselves. Research has shown that they even store the memory in a different area of the brain. This can happen if they imagine the trauma is happening to someone else. Evil people learned to reliably induce this reaction in children and give this other part of them a name. Then they give this new identity/personality a hypnotic code word that the identity is trained to respond to, by taking control of the person at that moment.
So then the person has another identity/personality that they can go a lifetime never knowing exists. Then their controller can switch the person instantly, with the code word, and control the person, in that other, hidden, personality, to do anything they want, and then switch them back to the only personality they know they have, having no conscious memory of what happened in that interval. It appears their controller will, many times, wake the person into the controlled personality at night, or switch them, where, and when, they will not notice the missing time segment in their known memories. This can be used to get the person alone, or with other controllers, switch them, use them, and then sit them back down in the same chair and switch them back to their conscious personality, that they know themselves to be – and get by with rape, and worse, for many years. (But the victim being strangely tired for years may be a persistent, noticeable impact, but, for them, it can seem normal, if it’s all they have ever known.)
But this is only the beginning of what they can do with these methods. For trafficking, they will likely leave the person’s other identity/personality as a compliant child that does whatever they are told. Compliance can be accomplished by severe abuse, including outright torture. But they can also train this other personality to be an agent or assassin. If their goal is to destroy the Church, they force the person, in their nighttime personality, to participate in rituals and acts that will invite demons into themselves. Those demons can then exert more and more control over any personality/identity the person has. This is what they do to ministers that were split as children, such as by a “nice,” “Christian,” person who volunteers to work in the church nursery, maybe even with another secret cult member, so it looks like the protection of accountability is there, when it is not.
Unfortunately, the easiest and quickest way to demonize a child is for people in the occult to rape or molest them. Since the scripture says that sex makes one “one flesh” with their spouse (Genesis 2:24, Matthew 19:5-6, Mark 10:8), or a harlot (1 Corinthians 6:16), that creates a channel for demons to flow through into them, from the rapist, or molester – from then on, until action is taken to close that channel. This is often called a “soul tie” by deliverance ministers/exorcists. This is how they attack ministers and their families. People can become sincere ministers by day, and demon-infested cult members, under control of the cult, at night. And having a demon is normally nothing like Hollywood movies portray. Instead, demons hide their influence and control. Please remember that we are eyewitnesses to these things, but not as perpetrators, and this is not “conspiracy theory.”
People are using these methods to control others in government, the military, education, and the business world, and my wife and I are eyewitnesses to that. We were victims, and God planned it that way. It is part of our callings, being given a grand tour of evil in the world, so we can expose and fight it, understanding it, as eyewitnesses. We are more prepared than anyone to drain the swamp, because we know who and what is behind it – and God has protected us and anointed us for the battle.
I have authority from God to pronounce judgment, and see it carried out, like the Apostles did in the book of Acts (chapters 5:1-11, 8:9-24, and 13:6-11). They dealt with sorcerers, too – even one trying to control a government official. That is what these people are. Biblical examples of prophets in government include Moses, Joseph, Samuel, David, and Daniel. But Satan has learned to keep most of his people well hidden and have them live cover-story lives, even as flawless Christians, such that, if they are ever accused, people are much less likely to believe it. And they can be really likable people, even your best friend, and you will not know they are controlling you and doing great evil, until God reveals it and shows you the evidence. They use their methods and hypnosis to make you like them as friends, and trust them, and their advice. Thus they control leaders, and the organizations, or countries, they lead. Sorcery and demons can impose any human emotion, and thoughts you think are your own – hence they can drive people to insanity or suicide. But they are more likely to push them desired directions, a little at a time, controlling them without them realizing it. But Christians who truly follow scripture carefully are much more protected. Unrepented sin creates vulnerability.
God can take a person through a healing process that gets the suppressed memories of torture and more to conscious awareness and healed. But getting there is a long, difficult process of forcing painful and raw suppressed memories to conscious awareness, by enduring great trial that makes one feel like the suppressed emotions and memories of torture and trauma made one feel. That is what we went through, with God leading, step by step.
These cults work together to destroy anyone setting their people free, or getting free themselves – and that conveniently arranged the necessary trials (to force the pain and emotions suppressed, to conscious awareness). And God defended us. If people wait long enough, and get away from their controllers, sometimes things will naturally come to conscious awareness, usually much later in life – when their abusers are out of reach from prosecution, or dead. With God about to take out the controllers, there may be millions of people going through the painful memory recovery and healing process, much sooner than in the past. Our stories can help them and give them hope.
So the structures of society are a mixture of those controlled, and those who secretly control them, and those not yet affected by this great war in process behind the scenes, but likely vulnerable to influence by demonic sorcery, and true Christians not yet wounded in this way – whom they want to kill because they cannot control them. And getting access to children is the key to them increasing their hold on a society. They can quickly and easily split the personalities of children and create an identity/personality they can control, but keep secret. Then, if that child grows up and rises to an important position, that child-like personality can be controlled and developed to do their bidding, and the person will not even realize they are doing it. And using the controlled identity, they can work to establish more control over the person as they know themselves to be.
Few seemed to notice when Biden called for mandatory preschool for all children over age three. (After age eight, children are much harder to successfully split and program.) But they did notice when they started threatening parental rights and pushing sex change surgeries. Children can be programmed as to their supposed “gender identity,” by their control methods, in very little time. And these people controlling others progress in their evil over time, and are reported to become pedophiles. Knowing that, from the testimony of a high-level defector from their ranks, opens one’s eyes to what they are really after. In fact, God says the Antichrist was bribing them with being able to take our wives, daughters, and children, once they establish the totalitarian government they are after.
Those in power in the last administration were not seeking America’s good with policies with which we did not agree. They were outright trying to destroy America as we know it and take over with a totalitarian government they control. They were also working toward economic collapse and collaborating with the enemies of the nation to do so. God indicated Ukraine was a contrived deal with Russia, to drain the U.S. treasury toward economic collapse. And they were also collaborating with radical Islam to make us lose World War Three, against radicalized Islam, and starting with what God calls terrorist “mayhem” on our soil. The open border facilitated that, as well as much human trafficking they profit from, and trying to tip the election.
I adapted, further down, a considerable amount, from what I prepared for high leaders. Let me start by saying I have a book of my story, available on Amazon, that is over 500 pages, but it does not cover the most extreme callings. The book was written for the masses, to teach them many things, and mentor prophets, and correct the Church, in a coming time of crisis, but also tell much of my story. It was written from the trenches of spiritual battles and trials.
God has had me write leaders for years, and put the important details of what they need to know on my web sites, AndrewHadden.org, for the Church, and AndrewHadden.com, for areas that involve issues with government, legislation, political candidates or officeholders, and reform, which churches and ministries here (in the U.S.) can’t talk about. I tell my story, very briefly, for those who feel clueless, and the casual observer, in Blog 0001 on the dot org site titled, “My Story.” The dot org Blog 0009, “The Rest of the Story,” tells my story more like I tell it in personal and custom-drafted letters to leaders in the Church. It includes the long history of ministers and proven prophets prophesying my callings for many years, and confirming the revelations I got for myself, but was very slow to accept, because they were so big. The story of “My Government Calling,” with similar prophecies and confirmations, for that calling, is covered in Blog 0015 by that name on my dot com site. There is also a sample of my book on the dot org site, with the introduction, and descriptive chapter titles, and the first five chapters of the book, enough for people to feel like they know me and get a quick overview of my story.
Education, Credentials, and Experience
To help make all this more believable, I should mention that I have graduate degrees and professional credentials in multiple, very different, disciplines. I earned a degree in management, with math and physical science minors, before God called me. I attended Bible college, where the dean advised me to get a master’s degree in Bible, and in business administration, which I had originally planned, and I felt God was in his advice. I have a master’s degree in Bible from my denomination’s fully accredited seminary, and earned it physically attending. I earned a Master of Business Administration degree (MBA) from a large university, along with adding the equivalent of an accounting major and CPA (Certified Public Accountant) credentials. I excelled academically, and God arranged the varied preparation, and more along the way. I also had top experience in top companies/organizations in various professional roles – accountant, chief accounting officer, financial analyst, forecasting and planning analyst, systems analyst, information technology management, and systems consultant, and was professionally certified in disaster recovery planning. I have been an associate pastor, and an interim youth pastor, and was ordained and served in leadership at my denomination’s headquarters for over 12 years, and was admitted to an international professional society for deliverance ministers/exorcists. I was also published on the gifts of the Holy Spirit at the scholarly level, and on spiritual warfare. I prophesied and preached in churches for years while at the denominational headquarters. Then I founded and ran my own ministry and a consulting firm, to make it easier to minister to people in government who may listen to consultants, but not ministers.
Proof of Being a Prophet, and More
But my biggest contribution was being sent by God to tell leaders major, strategic things coming, and having them come, for decades. I feel God wants me to mention them. In the eighties, I was sent to tell top missions’ leaders of China opening to “missionaries” and the strategy, and it has been used by everyone ever since – using laymen to be spiritual shepherds. In 1995, I warned the leader of my denomination of sweeping revival coming and it swept the denomination for five years, and was the biggest thing since the denomination’s founding. I warned leaders of Arab Islamic terrorism coming ten months, and again ten days, before 9/11. I told of a vision of a world map with terrorism marked all over the world, and saw basically the same map, fulfilled, on the news five years later. I warned of disaster coming, and within a week, our whole region was a federally declared disaster area.
In April of 2016, God gave me a list of things coming to add to a sermon on the end times, and we have been marching through that list ever since. It warned of storms, including hurricanes, when Florida had not had one make landfall as a hurricane in over ten years. It has been pounded ever since, by even record hurricanes. I also warned of brutality, violence, riots, plague, and quarantine before they came. In March of 2016, God told me Trump would be president – and we have had many visions and dreams and prophecies about him. God told me a day would be a day of blood, and, late that evening, it became the day of the bloodiest shooting in the history of the nation. God wanted to assure me that I hear his voice, before he sent me to “Save the nation,” as he put it. I hope this is a sufficient sample.
The list above of fulfilled prophecies should be a reasonable basis to consider that I might really be a prophet. What will be shocking to the whole world will be God presenting proof that I am a prophet predicted in scripture to come in the end times, and have a large role in the end times. That proof will be God presenting signs and wonders never before seen, including my body having been transformed into a supernatural body, much like an angel, and glowing, along with other supernatural signs. (See my blog, “Signs and Wonders – The Glow of Moses,” on my AndrewHadden.org site.) The account, in Revelation 11, clearly indicates the two witnesses are defended in a way standard human bodies cannot defend, so the transformation of their bodies is basically predicted in scripture.
Too long, self-proclaimed “experts” have insisted that the end times will begin with the “rapture,” or catching away, of the saints, basically before anything bad happens. That view is based on unwarranted assumptions, and the most optimistic interpretations and conclusions. They conclude that a pretribulation rapture is the only way God can fulfill a single statement that we are not appointed to his wrath. God has other ways, and they are stated in scripture, but ignored. That faulty teaching, and the way it has been depicted, in movies and novels, will leave people in great fear and panic thinking that they have no hope, if the end times have clearly started, and they are still here.
I am providing this to you, with the biggest sign having been promised but not yet displayed to the world. My former human body will be transformed into a supernatural or spiritual body, such that I will be able to, at my option, glow brightly, or look normal and blend in with everyone else – with the exception that I looked my age, before the transformation, and will look half my age, permanently. I will also be able to wield great power and strength, and not be harmed by anything in this world. And scripture notes that any that try will be destroyed by flames in defense. I will be equipped by God to be a defender and deliverer of God’s people, and his spokesman, in the end times, which have begun. At the end, God will change me, us, to lift his protection, so that we can die, and be resurrected 3½ days later, and taken to heaven, leaving those that remain on the Earth in great fear, to fulfill scripture.
I am one of the two witnesses, as is my wife. Our roles are prophesied in predictive symbolic types in the biblical book of Zechariah, chapters three and four, by the examples of the high priest and the governor, and prophesied directly in Revelation chapter 11, as two prophets to come in the end times. (The original Greek language in Revelation 11 allows for one of them to be a woman.) The prophetic types in Zechariah chapters three and four depict them as channels of anointing, God’s enablement, for God’s servants, ministers and more, in the end times. In Revelation 11 they are depicted defending God’s people with disciplines, judgments, on those nations that would seek to persecute them, and hold them captive. Those judgments will be in equal measure to what they do, or plan to do, to God’s people. This is much like Moses was a defender of God’s people in his day, people held in oppression and slavery by the superpower of their day, ancient Egypt. That superpower was decimated.
I also fulfill the role of a prophet prophesied to come before the coming of Christ. John the Baptist fulfilled several prophecies for Christ’s first coming. I have been given to fulfill them for Christ’s second coming. In midlife, God led me to genealogical evidence, from distant relatives in England, that we are Jewish by blood, and descended from John the Baptist. I have noted a principle taught, that if one does not fully fulfill a calling, God will raise up a descendant to fully fulfill it, and John was prophesied to come in the spirit and power of Elijah, yet the scripture says John did no miracles. People have had revelations of me calling down fire like Elijah. One of those prophecies, which John fulfilled, and I must as well, is Malachi chapter three, verse one and following, where God says, “Behold, I will send My messenger, and he shall prepare the way before me . . ..” God considers my role as his messenger a very important role.
There is something else very important you should know. A widely known scholar, Dr. Michael Heiser, was chosen to present to a meeting of the “Evangelical Theological Society,” ETS. He had a broader perspective than most, having knowledge of the languages and writings of twelve middle eastern civilizations, including the Hebrews/Israel. His doctoral dissertation focused on “The Divine Council,” the rank and functions, and future, of supernatural beings loosely called angels by many. Multiple cultures had accounts of them. They included “sons of God” who had higher rank and power than angels. Angels are/were messengers, by their function. The sons of God, lesser elohim, had a nature like God, but lesser capabilities and power. They were on the divine council as rulers of nations/people groups, under God, with angels under them. But many of them fell, with Satan. (Dr. Heiser’s ETS presentation on “The Divine Council” is available as a Kindle book on Amazon for around three dollars and he states his conclusions in everyday language before he gets to the scholarly proof of them.)
But Heiser taught very convincingly that it is God’s plan, in scripture, to replace fallen angels, and lesser elohim, small “g” “gods,” also known as “sons of God,” with promoted humans. Heiser wrote a number of books related to these topics. This was accepted enough for him to present it to the organized group of evangelical scholars, ETS. What people seem not to have focused on, is that, not only is Satan to be bound for a thousand years, released briefly, and then cast in the lake of fire, but also will be replaced on the divine council. Thus Christ will have a promoted human, through whom he chooses to rule the Earth, at some point.
I was not chosen for the roles I have been given because I am the most accomplished scholar on these matters, or the most eloquent public speaker, or have the largest following – as many judge ministers today. I have the roles because, as God explained, I have been tested and tried above all others and remained submitted, obedient, and respectful to Christ. And I, and my wife, were raised in families in ministry. But we were also chosen and handed over to Satan and his followers, practitioners of great occult power, to do their worst to us, in secret, short of maiming or killing us, from birth, to try to prevent us from ever fulfilling these callings. They were allowed to try to get us to turn against Christ, by torture almost beyond imagination, and trauma and intimidation by great horrors from practitioners of evil, and principalities and powers from the fallen spiritual realm, from which Satan’s cohorts now rule.
Satan is accomplished at making people suppress the memories of what he and his minions have done to them, but God is accomplished at bringing such memories to conscious awareness, and healing them, if one is obedient enough to live a life of great pain and trial, at length, that makes them feel like the suppressed torture and trauma made them feel. Very few are that obedient, but we were. So we have had a grand tour of evil in the world, going on in secret, including in government, the Church, and all of society. We know what must be fought, and how to fight it. We know why judgment must come.
I did not choose these callings, or desire them. I wanted God’s presence and his voice, to live my life close to God. I was stunned, shocked, and afraid of the callings he asked me to fulfill. I agreed out of obedience to God. I had to grow into them for a long time. I tested and tried these things for many years, reluctant to accept that God would ask these things of me. But now I realize that God had to find somebody to fulfill these roles, that he trusted with power, for the sake of his people, worldwide. Many people that desire power and authority, generally can’t be trusted with it.
Christ has taught me to rely on him, stay connected to him, so that I speak and act as he would. That is what I strive for. But God, himself, has taught me much, and I paid attention, and took notes, and typed, and repeatedly reviewed what he had told me, for decades. And, eventually, when my highest callings were made known, and accepted by me, and I had been tried all the more, God told me and showed me much that others have never been told, or shown, about the future, and the past, and the spiritual realm and its occupants.
Amber’s Story
This is Amber, Andrew’s wife. God wants me to tell some of my testimony, my journey. I have been writing my story in a book, so telling it in short form can be difficult. May God give you grace to read and understand. It is not an easy story to tell, and not an easy story to hear. But the good news, and what my hope is, is that people will come away knowing that God is bigger than anything the enemy could ever do. With obedience to God, and listening to his voice, he has been setting me free from the greatest evils you could possibly imagine, and likely worse than you could imagine.
There are scriptures that tell us of great evil that prophets were shown and then were sent to warn against, before the evil was judged. My husband and I have been on a journey, (him longer than I, as he is considerably older). God has had us warning secret Satanists for years, of judgement that God had planned against them, for the great evil and injustice they do against God’s people. Most of these warnings were shared not knowing it applied to them, with us telling some of our story of what we had witnessed, personally, and God speaking that he would judge this kind of evil. This was often before God gave any indication that the person we were talking to was actually a secret Satanist, embedded within the churches to which we were sent.
Just like in scripture, when prophets were sent to see great sin, or evil, behind the scenes, and then explain for what God was judging, we are two who are sent to explain why a good God is still good, even when people will be left with many questions, when these judgements come – across the world. We are eyewitnesses, and we are prophets, and the two roles are intertwined. My testimony is also a defense of God and his character, as I am an eyewitness to this great evil, going on behind the scenes. It is not easy to hear about, but imperative, in defense of God’s character, to know what he is judging, when many will look at those they see judged as having been good, even Christian people. It actually makes me think of the scripture, “These people draw near to Me with their mouth, and honor Me with their lips, but their heart is far from Me…” (Matthew 15:7, NKJV). I should note that they have largely gone after God’s people in an effort to infiltrate, persecute, and try and stop the Church; but they are also abusing people all over, not just within the Church, but seeking to control the masses with their evil agendas.
I was born in Indonesia, to Baptist missionary parents, but brought back to the U.S. as a baby, when my father had cancer that needed treated. I was raised in Southern Illinois, until I left home at seventeen, and started school at a Christian university in Missouri. I was raised in what I always believed was a Christian home, and raised in the Church – with my father eventually being the counseling pastor of a large Baptist church. But there were internal signs of something wrong, including the extreme lack of confidence I bore for most of my life, as well as suicidal thoughts / tendencies that would recur, at intervals, until God started healing wounds deep within me.
I was raised believing the gifts of the Holy Spirit had ceased, and went to a Baptist university, but I had a lot of unanswered questions, and was seeking God for answers. I knew God, and I loved him, but something was very broken inside. And one day, as I found myself reading in the book of Revelation, about the Laodicean church, and how God says he will spit the lukewarm out of his mouth (Revelation 3:14-22), I had a sudden realization that I, too, was lukewarm. And it terrified me. I began praying a repeated prayer, something I prayed for a couple of years, when I could see that something was broken within me, and I couldn’t see the fire in me that I thought should be there, according to scripture. That repeated prayer I prayed was, “Lord, set my heart on fire.”
Fast forward a couple of years after completing college, and in August of 2007, I wound up at Andrew’s prayer ministry, seemingly by “accident,” but really, it was a divine appointment to put two very unlikely people together – only neither one of us had any idea of God’s intentions, for a long time. Andrew was the first person to ever prophesy to me, and initially used to teach me about the gifts of the Holy Spirit. He taught me how to fight, spiritually, when warfare went off the scale, after coming to his ministry. And I was baptized in the Holy Spirit at his prayer ministry, not long after I had met him. When I met him, I was already in the process of planning to move a few hours away, to be connected with the International House of Prayer, in Kansas City, Missouri, which many called the “IHOP.” I had no idea, when God was pushing me to move there, that they were immersed in, not just prayer, but the gifts of the Holy Spirit.
Much later in my healing process, I would learn that the International House of Prayer had also been largely infiltrated by closet Satanists, one of which happened to be my younger relative. God still worked in my life in my time there, but I faced much that would be shocking, if shared. But there were many good people there also, totally unaware of the infiltration.
People began prophesying over me, repeatedly, about having a prophetic calling. But when someone said the word “prophet,” I felt emotionally overloaded, and, in all honesty, was initially upset that God would call me to be one, having been raised in a denomination that doesn’t even believe prophets exist today. God was also using others to say that I was called to preach – with me being someone who came from the Baptist denomination, where they don’t even believe in women preachers, from what I observed.
I can laugh about it now, but I feel like I’ve been being stretched, repeatedly, ever since being baptized in the Holy Spirit, with God continually asking things of me I didn’t want to do. God actually endorsed a word by a very prophetic young woman to me, with a strong manifestation of the presence of the Holy Spirit, as she declared that I was called to be a “Prophet to the nations.” By this time in my life, I did not have trouble believing that prophets still existed, but God saying that he was making me into one was much harder. I knew that God was God, and he could do what he wanted with whomever, but to say that I was lacking in confidence is an understatement. I have had to learn to take everything a step at a time, and just listen and obey, as God speaks or gives directions. And he was guiding me and helping me, all along in my journey.
After being baptized in the Holy Spirit, and connecting to Andrew, Ephesians chapter six, on spiritual warfare, also began to take on a whole new meaning for me. My life felt like it was surrounded by warfare, and it was, in ways that I absolutely couldn’t deny. I always believed that we were in a battle, while on the Earth, but it became glaringly obvious, as the demonic attacks against me became frequent, even expected. Andrew was helping fight on my behalf, praying for me, and rallying others to pray for me, as many attacks would come against me in the days after I met him, and for a long time afterwards. I did not have the knowledge, or understanding, for why I was being attacked so severely, but nausea became a frequent attack. I worked an alternating schedule, one week on, at a children’s home, for behavioral teenaged girls, a couple hours away, and had one week off, to be at the IHOP, or sometimes was in between the IHOP and Andrew’s prayer ministry. I would feel completely fine, physically, at the children’s home. But when I headed towards the IHOP prayer room, nausea would instantly hit me, when I was about ten minutes away, every time, like clockwork. And then there were other attacks, such as being physically choked by a demon, while lying on my bed one night. I didn’t have the training, at the time, to know how to fight, but eventually got the name “Jesus” out of my mouth, and the demon left.
I knew that the enemy was fighting me, and was obviously not happy about me being spiritually hungry and actively pursuing God as I was. But I did not know that I had “open doors,” as in doors open to the demonic, that had been opened over my life in a spiritual sense, that were allowing the enemy to attack me. God had been taking me through a deep process of inner healing, ever since I came to Andrew’s prayer ministry, something that Andrew had prophesied God wanted to do, when I first came to his ministry. And, minutes later, another minister, from a nearby church, came in unexpectedly, and prophesied the same word again, but in greater detail. But then, after I’d already felt like I had gone through some healing in about every category I could think of, God began to warn me of far more pain coming. He started to talk to me about wanting to give me more authority, but said that it would cost me, even “friends.” In looking back, I often heard things from the Lord that I didn’t necessarily understand, fully. But I would write down what he said. When I looked back, later, I was kind of stunned at what God had spoken that later settled in and proved out, in time.
God began warning me, both personally, as well as through others, about much more healing I needed to go through. There was pain under the surface I could not explain. I didn’t know where it was coming from, but there was deep-rooted pain and emotions I faced, internally. But God’s descriptions became more graphic. For example, someone gave me a prophetic word about pain coming that punctures lungs. It honestly sounded a little dramatic, such that I wasn’t even sure if it was God when she said it. Another friend shared a vision of a “dam.” She said that the water retained by the dam was full of tears. She also talked about how a dam is virtually indestructible, but she saw an angel at the dam, and spoke of how the angel was going to break it open. The dam was representative of the pain that was locked inside of me, pain that the Lord was saying needed to come out. God was constantly setting up situations around me to cut me, like a surgeon, to get the hidden pain out.
God put me on an extended fast, something he’d never asked me to do before. It was at the end of this fast, in January of 2009, that suppressed memories first surfaced (came to conscious awareness), and my life would forever change. I had been diligently seeking God, and faced much spiritual warfare that I had to fight through. I was also fully aware I had to be completely dependent upon God, even for my very survival. I would need his love and his voice to preserve me, in the days ahead, as a whirlwind of pain was about to hit me, like I’d never faced before.
At that time, I learned that I had suppressed a great deal of abuse, abuse that was hidden deep inside, because it was too traumatic for me to handle, when it all happened. I had no knowledge of suppressing memories, and certainly had no idea that I had suppressed a great deal of my childhood, and my life in general. Those who abused me knew they were abusing me under a separate identity that was storing all of that pain – a child that would shut down and become compliant. Extreme fear and trauma can cause one to shut down, and I was conditioned, programmed if you will, from birth, to not fight against those who used and abused me.
It is shocking to think that you can live your life with many memories stored and hidden away from you, and not even realize it. But much of my abuse was done in the night hours, so I had plenty of daytime memories, and was not aware of there being blocks of time missing. But, eventually, God helped me realize that I did have many daytime lost time segments, but I thought I had just been staring off in my room for hours, on many occasions, because of all the pain in my life. I would stare off in my room, and then realize hours had gone by. I realized this wasn’t normal, but I knew I did it many times.
But there were memories that I’d always had, memories that I hadn’t suppressed, that matched up with the suppressed memories that came to the surface, or to conscious awareness – such as a miscarriage that happened, when I was about 13 years old, and me not being sexually active, in any known memory. I did not realize that I had a miscarriage, but I had passed something, physically, in great pain, as a young teenager.
When I started dealing with the first memories that surfaced, which were of me being gang raped in an occult setting, as a teenager, (a time when I was especially suicidal), I also had memories of seeing early term babies sacrificed. I was then forced to face the horrific reality that the babies were mine, taken from my body in forced, early-term abortions, in occult settings. This all correlated with a time when I remembered dealing with frequent nausea in the mornings, trouble getting out of bed to get to the bus on time for school, missed cycles, and uncontrollable bleeding, when I did bleed. I spent times in so much pain, I would be curled up on my bed, hurting. I also remember looking at myself and thinking that I looked pregnant, but I had no memories of being raped, at that age, and knew I had not been sexually active. (Being pregnant would have been hard for others to observe, because I wore a lot of baggy clothing in those days, likely something I was programmed to do, to conceal the pregnancies, because dressing in baggy clothing started all of the sudden, in a pronounced way). Then God brought back a traumatic memory I’d always had, of physically passing something from my body, but not understanding what it was, or why it had been traumatic. And he showed me it was a miscarriage. And looking at a book on anatomy and biology showed me the terrible truth I had suppressed. I also had stretch marks, typical of pregnancy, but did not know why.
Contrary to what one might expect, I was making huge leaps in my healing, as God was bringing truth to conscious awareness. Someone even prophesied to me, quoting from the scripture, saying I would know the truth, and the truth would set me free (John 8:32). It was not easy, but God was with me, and I was holding onto him, with everything I could, knowing I absolutely needed him to get me through what I was facing.
Andrew was my friend. In fact, he had, as unlikely as it was to the two of us, become what I came to call one day, “my best friend besides Jesus.” There was an age gap, such that it was a little different, but all I knew was that God had connected the two of us, in his purposes. He was the main one walking through this healing with me, as a friend, though there were others. At his ministry, everyone was encouraged to minister to others, and nothing was done as “counseling.” And God was the most important one in my healing process. God was speaking to me, very regularly, preserving me, with his love and kindness, in the midst of my pain.
But then the attacks came. I couldn’t see everything for what it was, at the time it all took place. Looking back, I have so much clarity now. But people began to attack Andrew. And they began to attack me. They attacked the validity of the memories, even accusing me of listening to demons. When I was having nausea come against me, and it came almost instantly, as a clear demonic attack, I was told by one of the pastors at the church I was in, that if I really believed I belonged to God, I wouldn’t be facing the attacks. In other words, if I had enough faith, I wouldn’t be sick. I was in her home, struggling with nausea, after trying to share some of what I was going through. God had also been delivering me of spirits of affliction, as well as spirits of fear, etc. associated with the occult and their abuse against me. She didn’t have any trouble believing deliverance was needed for Christians, (many others did, but that is another story). However, she believed if one needed deliverance, it was one time, and instant. My continuing to struggle was evidence to her that I didn’t have enough faith – which felt like being stabbed by people in the church, when I was already in the middle of a horrific amount of pain.
Prior to much of what I faced, God showed me a vision of a bloody bunny in the mouth of a wolf. I somehow knew the bunny was me. I also had seen a vision of sheep that turned into wolves, which I knew was related to people in the church we were in. I knew God was warning me that there would be those that I saw as like sheep who would turn, and become like wolves. I did not realize, however, when I had this vision, that many of those that I would have considered to be leaders, or people that I respected, even my friends, would become the wolves. Thus, God’s warning to me about losing “friends” was fulfilled. And Andrew later compared much of what was done to me, to be like a shepherd beating a sheep that was in the mouth of a wolf.
I knew that God was with me, and I knew that Andrew would stand by me, though they attacked him for it. But I did lose many friends. It would take many years before I learned the truth. The memories that initially started, in early 2009, were of me being gang raped in occult ritual settings, in the woods near my house. Eventually, I knew that I had been abused, from birth. They start early, knowing that the younger the child is, the more likely they are to separate themselves from that memory by storing it in a part of them, which they don’t even know is there. It could be compared to pretending that the trauma is happening to someone else. And the cult that abused me knew what it was doing. They even abused me under a different name, intentionally trying to create a split part of me that would store the memories of trauma. They also did horrific things, even outright torture, to me to try and get me to renounce Christ.
There was a man who put on a mask with the face of Jesus, and raped me. They gang raped me and did horrific things to me as a child, and then they tell you to call out to God. When he doesn’t come, they use it to enforce a message that he doesn’t care, and he will never come rescue you. They did mock crucifixions, raping me on a cross lying flat, and did about every manner of evil you can imagine to defile anything that is of value to a true believer. When the memory of the man raping me with the mask of Jesus surfaced, I was grieved. I wept. But in all honesty, my reaction was one of mourning for my Savior and Friend that I love. I told God I was so sorry that they would do that to him, that they would mock him or his character like that, and, as I write, that is still how I feel. This is not just abuse. It is meant to turn people away from God. And it is Christian persecution, in what would seem to me to be one of the worst forms imaginable. They told me they would stop the rapes, etc., if I renounced Christ, but I never did renounce him, or my belief in him, no matter what they tried to do to me. But, as you could likely imagine, healing from this level of trauma has been traumatic, in itself. Others have told me, in meeting me, you would never imagine I had been through so much. Praise God, as that is a testimony to our great God and what he can do.
I could tell you many stories, stories that could break most anybody’s heart, if they care about people. It’s not my goal. I’m just trying to walk out this calling, as best I can, and be obedient to do whatever God asks of me. That’s all I’ve been trying to do, all along. I had no idea what God was calling me to do. I wrestled, years ago, over him calling me to be a “prophet.” You can’t imagine the shock and the wrestling I have been through to accept this calling. I will attempt to quickly summarize some of that story for you.
God first put Andrew in my life as a mentor and a friend. It was much, much later, when God revealed other plans – to put us together as partners in both ministry, and marriage. I knew of his calling to “fight the Beast,” before God ever indicated he would put us together, not just as friends, but in marriage. I wrestled with God putting me anywhere near this man, when I found out about his calling, which I always accepted and believed. I didn’t understand why God put me around someone who was called to this, and I couldn’t imagine why I would be anywhere near someone with that calling. Fast forward some time, and, fifteen years ago, Andrew and I were married. Despite whatever the trials, we have had a wonderful marriage and remain best friends. But I have always felt “married to his calling,” as I’ve put it. It was kind of my way of expressing feeling somehow attached to his calling, unable to get away from it. I loved Andrew, but I knew that there were trials we would face, simply because of the calling, and the opposition to it by the enemy. We tell some of our story and trials here, but in all honesty, the tests God puts one through, to ensure he can give them great authority, are more brutal than most people could imagine. And, with the tests my husband was put through, me also being put through them was mostly unavoidable. I understand God has his reasons, and have learned to endure, but not without going through many boxes of facial tissues.
I’m obedient to do what he asks, no matter the cost, (and I have paid a huge cost, more than I can express), but my reward is that I get to be near to God. And that’s what I’ve wanted all along. But I later found things God had said to me, years ago, long before Andrew or I were ever married, that were kind of stunning. But God did use many to speak some very strong words over me about being called to be a “prophet to the nations” and about “fiery words” that would come forth.
I had been surrounded by secret Satanists, even within the churches I had been in. And it was not a small number of people. Unfortunately, when there are so many people who can appear to be Christians, and they have learned how to blend into the Church, it can seem nearly impossible to discern. I know that may sound hard to believe, but it’s the truth. Even though I am an eyewitness, the things we have seen are still hard to fully accept, because it is very hard for anyone to believe that there can be so much evil, or that it would be so hard to recognize. And when the Church is full of infiltrators, those infiltrators can act like leaven, that makes bread rise, and scripture says, “A little leaven leavens the whole lump” (Galatians 5:9). (The Apostle Paul uses it to illustrate how corruption spreads in the Church.) But eventually, God explained that one must be strong to receive discernment of the Satanist infiltrators in the Church, because when God gives someone discernment, the Satanist infiltrators immediately know they have been discerned.
There are a couple of blogs that my husband wrote that can give you more explanation and understanding, as some of what we have to share is a lot to digest, if you have never been exposed to it. There are two blogs I specifically felt led to mention. One is Blog 0013 on AndrewHadden.com, called, “Explaining Judgement Happening All Over.” This is a very detailed and thorough defense of what God is judging, and why. The second blog I felt to mention is Blog 0004, “Ritual Abuse and Mind Control Warning,” on AndrewHadden.org. This gives some background, including scripturally, for much of what we have shared. There are many scriptural references to great evil, including references to some of what we saw as eyewitnesses, that were going on even in Bible times.
God wants me to explain something else, something that is all too personal, unfortunately. It is to give an account of what God is really judging – hidden, secret, heinous sins being committed behind the scenes, of which I am an eyewitness. God has made a point that much of what we witnessed is going on all over, and these are not isolated incidents. I mentioned having gone to a Baptist university, which was in southwest Missouri. I learned, very late in the healing process, years after the initial memories began, that I had been passed around, and sold, by people all over my school. God later referenced my school, comparing it to being like a brothel for those in secret Satanism, including the Illuminati, and that it was filled with controllers, and those who were the controlled – those, like me, who were being used, without even realizing it. College was incredibly hard for me, and I had a lot of hidden pain and emotions in that time, but I had, for years, thought that revolved around an abusive boyfriend that I dated for an extended amount of time – several years, though there were times I had separated from him. As it turned out, he was doing even more than I knew to me, but he knew that I was split (had a controllable child-like identity within me to which he could switch me), and I would suppress the abuse. There were many in the school who were experts at displaying themselves as wonderful Christians, including someone I considered to be like a brother to me, who was actually using me, raping me behind the scenes. He later went on to be a missionary, and a pastor, and found a missionary organization. You have no idea the devastation this creates, as every person that acts like this has to be processed, and you feel the betrayals, again and again, no matter how many people betrayed you.
I knew that my boyfriend had raped me, once, but I did not realize that I had suppressed a great deal of other things that he had done to me. I had obtained a restraining order, in an effort to protect myself, after college. Police told me, in what I shared with them, that I had a worst-case scenario for getting killed, having heard similar stories of others who did not get help, to protect themselves, and then a boyfriend later tried to kill them, or successfully did.
However, I did not know that I had suppressed many memories, of things he had done to me, which included repeated rapes. Shockingly, I don’t think any of these people actually view it as “rape.” In fact, in a dream God gave me, something he has done to help me process and understand much of these things, someone I confronted in the dream for having raped me said to me, “We didn’t think you would remember,” as if that gave them the right to do it. That seems to be the attitude these people take. They have no conscience, having had it seared long ago, and believing they are completely at liberty to do whatever they want, especially when they sincerely believe that the victim will never know. They have reason to believe this, as what it takes to get healed seems almost as bad, in some ways, as the abuse itself. But we know they sometimes kill people that start having memories come to conscious awareness, that might incriminate them. God had us go into a state program to hide our address, even from the police (and police can be involved too), until God said he was ready to protect us with death, if necessary.
Most people remain almost constantly busy in our society, something that works to help keep these memories from breaking through to conscious awareness. And when controllers are involved in their lives, the chance of memories surfacing is very, very slim. And in cases where someone remembers a close family member raping them, often times, it is when they are much older, or when that family member has even passed away. In my case, it was my obedience to what God asked, including slowing down, and submitting to much trial, that pushed these memories to the surface. And it was over the course of over fifteen years.
I also worked, during my senior year of college, and beyond, at a “Christian” local business. I was a graphic design artist. It gets rather complicated, because I worked incredibly hard, and did work that I could account for, on the computer. But I was also being used, and sold, behind the scenes, even while on the graphic design job, and even by the owner and head boss of the business. His wife, however, as I would learn, was a victim and controlled – a sincere Christian who didn’t even know that her husband is evil. There were many victims at my work, but also many controllers. While they did actual business, legit business, selling merchandise, they were also selling people – trafficking them without their knowledge of it, using their evil knowledge to entrap people, and use them, in the worst ways. And they were near the college and hired lots of young people.
I was sold, used, even as a little girl. This pattern continued, even throughout college and beyond, until God set me free. It was my obedience to stay in great trials, that was used to set me free, and the love and help of Andrew, my best friend and now my husband. What it takes to be free is horrific, but God has said, with the pressure of the times that people will be facing, learning and realizing that they are in the end times, and many that will lose people to which they are close (former controllers and abusers that will be judged), many will have memories that will surface in the days ahead. They will need love and support from caring people, especially from the true Church, across the world. We don’t know how soon, after this great judgement, memories will start surfacing, as it can take time. But with perpetrators and controllers being judged, it will make it “safe” enough for those memories to surface. God’s people need to be prepared to minister to those who will be in great need of their love and help, for their survival. God has repeatedly used people to call me a sign, “hope,” for the days ahead. It is about him, not me, but my heart is that people will find hope, in hearing my testimony, that God truly is able to heal and deliver from anything Satan, and his followers, can do. [This is the end of Amber’s telling of her story.]
Conclusion
This is Andrew again. Let’s conclude by looking at the good news here. God is about to defend his people to set them free from people oppressing them and doing terrible things to them, in secret, and preparing to slaughter them. You had to understand that, by hearing the testimony of the great evil going on in secret, all around you, and maybe even affecting your loved ones, like your children. But the people doing it, at least many of them, hid themselves, and protected themselves, by pretending to be very good people. Thus God had to explain this ahead of time, to spare people unnecessary fear. God warned of this coming in the Bible, in the parable of the tares, false wheat, in Matthew chapter 13. Please spread this message, to spare people that unnecessary and unwarranted fear, that God might be judging indiscriminately, when he is not, and what it might drive people to do. There is great hope. Christ still offers forgiveness to those that ask for it and trust in Christ’s sacrifice on the cross to pay the penalty for their sins. And Christ is taking back rule of the Earth from Satan, who has made a mess of it, for a very long time. Christ taught loving your neighbor, and forgiveness, and generosity. But he has some basic rules he wants followed, for good reason, which he will enforce more than in the past. He will rule. But he will continue to defend his people against those that do them harm, or plan to do them harm.